Friday, December 21, 2007

Sudden Divorce Syndrome

I read an article on about Sudden Divorce Syndrome--how one in four men who will get divorced this year will not see it coming.

The article goes on to say that women will stop talking about a relationship with their partner when they think the relationship is over. In other words, we stop talking, because it won't do any good.

Men however think that women have stopped talking (i.e. complaining) about the relationship because they are content. And that is why they don't see it coming.

The article suggests that men may want to try harder to salvage their marriage while it is still possible to do so.

Good advice, I say!

I once had a coffee "screener" date with a man who must have suffered from Sudden Divorce Syndrome, even though I hadn't heard that term yet.

He spent our whole coffee date talking about how he didn't see it coming. He was the walking wounded. I felt bad for him, I guess, but felt he shouldn't be out dating yet if he would spend a whole date talking about his divorce. From my point of view, that is pretty yuck.

He kept saying that his marriage was happy, his wife was happy, and so was he. I kept thinking, what is his problem that he had no clue how unhappy she was? I thought he must be terribly self centered to not even check the temperature of his marriage. I was right--he was self centered, and apparently so are at least 25 percent of divorced men. It really pays to work on relationships and care about what your partner thinks and feels.

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